Tales of the Parodyverse

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AJA
Mon Feb 06, 2006 at 12:51:48 pm EST
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"Hey, Arnie!" called out Snookie, Private Detective Arnie J. Armbruster's Secertary/Asistant/Friend.

Arnie moaned, she was being to loud. It was Monday & Arnie was trying to sleep off his hang over from his 2 or 3rd favorite thing to do on a weekend: Getting drunk off your ass.

Snookie walks into Arnie's small office & drops a book on to the desk. Arnie raises his head & his eyes start to focus on the books title: The Who's Who to the Parodyverse, version 14.1.

"A new edition?" Arnie half mumbles.

"Yes & I checked: we are in there." Snookie said with a smile.

"Cool." Arnie said as put his head down on his desk.

Snookie leaves the office.

---------


Later that day, Arnie called Snookie into his office. Snookie came & Arnie looked better: He always looks better post hang over.

"We need cilents!" He said.

"Ok."

"Who do we have on the rolodex?"

"A few bars, a few good take out places, a few hospitals that will still take you, poison control, Lusty Lady's Call Girls...." Snookie rattled off.

Arnie stopped her. "Anyone related to work?"

"We have the number to the payphone that the Reverend Tiki Tiki Master Bong normally answers."

"ok. Anyone else?"

"No."

"Why not?

"Your normally to drunk too to take any cases."

"Well, it's a new year & let's change that."

"Ok. How do we do that?"

"Being less drunk would work. Also, good word of mouth works normally. But,..."

"But, what?"

"Your Drunken Repretation proceeds you. Plus..."

"What?"

"Most of the people who we'd deal with already have someone."

"Who?"

"Miss Waltz."

"Lisa Waltz?"

"One & the same. Also..."

"Who?"

"Yuki Shiro."

"Who's that?"

"A Private Detective & member of the Lair Legion."

"Why would they be stopping us from getting cilents?"

"Well, Miss Waltz happens to deal with most of the big name Super Heroes around, mostly the Lair Legion & associates. So, she kind of decides who deals with them leagally. With your rep: I doubt she'll recomend you. Plus, I'd think most of Lair Legion may go to Miss Shiro for Detective help."

"Well, Lisa has got a rep, too!" Arnie retorted.

"Yes. We've all heard about Miss Waltz's allegedly infinite sexual capacity, but she is also the First Lady of the Lair Legion."

"So?"

"You think going around bad mouthing Miss Waltz is going to get us many friends, I doubt it. Plus, she has been around in the crazy old universe & done more stuff, no pun intended, then us. We're not even in the same class as Miss Waltz."

"What class are we in?"

"Miss Waltz is an Honor Student. We're in the class that doesn't let you use metal scissors & would have us ride the short bus to school." Snookie said sarcasticly.

"We're the retarded kids!"

"They prefer to be called differantly abled. But, in comparison to Miss Waltz: we are."

"crap."

"But, that can change: all we need is one big name Super Hero to use your Private Detective Skills and for you to actually use them well. If you did that: they might recommend you to their super powered friends & we might actually have clients."

"Ok. But, who would need our help?"

Well, you heard Arnie: He's looking for a client or more! He'll take anyone, he can't afford to be picky. So, readers of the Tales of the Parodyverse messageboard: do any of your characters have a problem that might need Arnie's detective skills to help solve? If so, please post a reply with the character's name & any other info that maybe help in writing them. (Well, please reply anyways. But, if you had a possible client: that would be great, too.)


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